CONFESSIONS OF A MOM

Can I just say I really don’t like being pregnant? I know I could have it much worse than I do and I should and am grateful for that, but I still really don’t like being pregnant. When Tigger was somewhere around a year I think, I remember being incredible frustrated when I realized that Tigger needed a sibling. I did not want to go through pregnancy again. Or the first few months after birth.

In a conversation with my mom I told her that if kids came at 6 months old then I would have no problem doing it again, but I really didn’t enjoy being pregnant and those first few months. Those first months I’m sure were due to lack of sleep with a baby who didn’t like to sleep and the uncomfortableness of nursing. (I know there are those that love it and would have it no other way. I respect them. Me, on the other hand, never enjoyed it. I was told that after the first month something would change and I would love. I kept waiting for that change that never came. It was always more of a burden and it never truly stopped hurting like I was told it would.)

But the pregnancy, I could do without. After Tigger was born people assured me that I would forget and want another baby at some point. Once again, I kept waiting for that point to come. It never did. The only reason I agreed to get pregnant again is because I knew there was a sibling waiting for Tigger. I never forgot how much I didn’t like being pregnant. I never forgot the pain, the uncomfortableness, the slowing down or any of it. You could say I went into knowing full well what I was getting myself into.

Then things didn’t work out as planned and here I am again. As with Lion, I never forgot what it was like to be pregnant. I never forgot the struggle I had keeping up with Tigger. I never forgot any of it. If I had my way, I wouldn’t be having another pregnancy, but I knew there was another sibling for Tigger. That doesn’t change the fact that I’m complaining about the pregnancy.

This may sound crazy, especially for those who have or are having issues getting pregnant, who want it so bad it hurts. My heart goes out to those women. I know it’s just a means to the end, but in the middle of it all, it’s just plain hard. I’m slowing down, Tigger’s speeding up and I’m struggling to keep him busy. It’s just not what I would call fun. I was just getting to the point that I could run and play with Tigger when we found out we were expecting. I pushed myself to get through the cultural celebration knowing that if I thought about it I wouldn’t be able to make it through.

I guess this turned into one of those complaining posts. With the way it began there really wasn’t any other way for it to go. So I apologize for that. Life really is good. We are excited to have another little boy in our family. I’m already trying to figure out what animal he will relate to since we already have Tigger & Lion. I’ve thought of a few other bigs cats but that one will most likely have to wait until he’s here with us.

So, just for fun, what is your favorite big cat? Or what would you vote for for the new little one?