I had a hard time coming up with a picture to lead into this post, but I think this one will work well.
This is how the conversation went with Tigger the other night.
"Can I have one?" he asked.
"Not right now," I responded. (He was giving me a hug right before bedtime.)
"But I really want one."
"Great. Not right now."
"But I won't eat it."
"That's great. Not tonight."
"But I'm just going to take one and save it for the morning."
"No you won't."
"But I'm just going to put it on my dresser."
"I said no."
"But . . ."
By this time I have to admit that I was less than patient. It had been a long day, and Tigger was stalling for bed. I had gotten them out because I needed some chocolate therapy. I knew I should have hid them but I was slow on responding to my thought. So once again I lost my patience.
After he was in bed and my thoughts returned to this situation I felt bad for my lack of control. And, as it often does when I find myself in this situation, my thoughts turned to my relationship with my Savior. Do I push my Savior like Tigger pushed me? Do I refuse to take the first answer given to me? Do I continue to push after the same answer has been given multiple times? Does my Savior lose His patience with me?
The only question I can answer with assurance is the last one. No, my Savior never looses patience with me. As for how I respond to when answers are given me . . . I'm not a hundred percent sure. I would like to say that I don't push. That I do accept the answer given, and I think there are many times that I do. Then there are those other times.
Like Tigger, I'm sure that I push or I don't hear the answer given. Or I don't want to hear the answer that is given. I know that sometimes I feel I know best but I'm always humbled when things backfire. I feel like I'm drawn to this thought process a lot lately as Tigger is pushing and trying to figure out boundaries. It drives me crazy because he seems to think that anything and everything is up for negotiation, and he's good at negotiating. Hubby continually says that Tigger will make a great salesman or a great politician. His reasoning ability is amazing, and I'm finding I'm having to be very careful with the way I answer things. But I'm very grateful for the lessons he's teaching me. I'm grateful for the self-reflection that he is causing me to have. It is helping me become a better person.
So, I'm doing my best to have extreme patience at all times but I am continually falling short. It's part of the learning process. I'm working on it. But as I'm working on it, I'm reminded of the extreme patience my Lord and Savior has for me. He knows me. He loves me. He is always there for me. For that, I am eternally grateful.
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